Change your Want-To

The other night I was listening to Beth Moore. She said several things that really hit home with me. I would like to share them, but don't want to have to try to directly quote her, so understand that several of the thoughts in this post will not be originally from me.

We usually do what we want to do, it it just a human thing to do. If we want to be able to change we need to change our want-to. We can give God obedience because we know it is the right thing to do, but when we want to do as God asks us it becomes part of who we are, thus easier.

I am not sure I am expressing it correctly, but when she was talking I thought of a conversation I had with a friend a few months ago: I told him that God says He will give us the desires of our heart, but that the more we love God the more His desires become our own. At the time I said I thought that was semi sneaky of God, but in taking a closer look at it I see a beautiful expression of God's love for us. He changes our "want-to" as we know Him better and delight in Him.

When we want to do a task it becomes a joy and not just a duty. There will be times when we obey because it is the right thing to do and that does please God, but I was challenged through Beth's talk to ask God to change my "want-to". Especially in the areas I struggle with, in the things that are hard.

I want to please God, and I want my heart's desires to reflect my love for Him. I want to "want-to" obey and please Him and to live life for Him because it is part of who I am, not just because it is good and right.

So my challenge to myself and to you is to ask God to change your want-to the next time you are struggling with something. Let His desires become your desires. 

All scripture is profitable for... reproof...

Recently I have been going through the process of deciding what the next step in life will be for me. I am sure you have been there before at some point, so you know it is a time of asking questions; trying to sort ideas, dreams, desires, goals and expectations. Life seemed to be heading one direction and I started making plans and allowed myself to get excited at the possibilities only to have God tell me no when I asked for clearer answers. 

To say I was disappointed would be significantly understating my emotions. I didn't understand what God was doing or why He seemed to allow me to walk down a path only to tell me to turn off it as soon as I started running. However, since there was nothing I could do about it I put it behind me and kept walking, looking for the next thing... or so I thought.

A couple of sundays ago I was sitting in church, partially listening and partially allowing my mind to wonder over plans and questions, when the Pastor asked if we had ever had God's plans differ from ours, or had God ever choose a path we would not have taken. As you can guess I thought to myself: "Oh yes! I know exactly what he's talking about."

Then  he spoke of  several examples in scripture of God asking people to do seemingly silly things, such as asking a tax collector to give up his comfortable life style to come follow Him. (I found it ironic that several of his examples had to do with life decisions) After giving examples of people's responses to God's direction in their life he asked if we accepted God's answers graciously. Were we willing to follow God's leading despite the cost, or direction, especially when it is not something we would have chosen.

Through these comments and the verses he pointed out God grabbed my attention completely, telling me I had not been gracious about His answers for me. Yes, I was 'doing the next thing' but my heart wasn't in it, and I was allowing myself to harbor a bad attitude while adopting a false sense of choosing the right thing. 

Verses such as: these people draw near to me with their lips but their hearts are far from me, and Love the Lord your God with all your heart... popped into my mind, followed by the verse: All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.

God wanted more than just outward compliance, He wanted me to trust Him with my heart. Though people might be fooled He wasn't... He wants me to be complete, thoroughly equipped for whatever He has next, but I need to let go first. To be honest about my emotions, not pretend to be happy about it all, but to acknowledge I was having a hard time with it, and to trust Him in the mist of my own confusion. 

I can't say I'm completely there. I know if I could see from God's perspective I would be happy about His decisions because they are ultimately for my own good... I am just glad He is patient with me till my heart gets there, and continues to work in my life in spite of my attitude. I am so glad we have a God that cares enough to reprove us when we need it, and one who cares enough to understand when we are confused.